Analysis of Student Writing and Lesson Plan

Analysis

Meaning of the piece

In his piece titled “The Pualup Fair”, Adam is writing in response to a prompt asking him to write about the best day of his life. There was obviously more time and purpose put into this piece of writing (more so than the other pieces he shared) and it is clear that this was a very important day to Adam. Prior to writing the four-paragraph essay, he used a graphic organizer to aid him in developing his story. This graphic organizer can be found on the first page attached to his essay. Adam explains this day with excitement, saying the dragon tattoo he got was “slick” and explains his attempt at a basketball shoot out as, “It was in the air! And…MISS!” Most importantly to Adam, he shared a few details about his very first concert, which he attended this same day. “Everyone was loud when it started. The first guitar sting being plucked.”

6 Traits Assessment

In Adam’s writing sample, he writes about a topic that is narrow and manageable, writing about a single most favored day. While he is able to pick out three aspects of his day that were most important to him, there are some details lacking to support these main ideas. For example, Adam writes about his first experience at a concert and says, “It was great! The most fun I have ever had.” Although, he does not share further supporting details behind these statements and therefore the reader does not know why the concert was so great. On the other hand, when sharing his other two favored aspects of the day (his dragon tattoo and basketball shoot out) he gives almost too many details. Adam notes word for word the conversations that were exchanged but does not share his thoughts or feelings about these experiences.

Looking at the organization of Adam’s writing, he draws the reader in from the start by saying, “It was 2009 and I was very excited.” He closes his writing by answering a question he raised in his opening paragraph, bringing the piece full circle but still leaving the reader with a desire for more explanation. The sequencing of his writing makes sense as the story is written in sequential order of the days’ events. Transitions, on the other hand, are sometimes unclear as to how the story jumped from one place to the next. The pacing of the writing is also somewhat uneven; sometimes he goes into too many details that do not relevant and does not move on, and other times more details are needed for the reader’s understanding (as described above when talking about ideas).

In relation to voice, Adam does not use many personal details to describe his day at the fair. Instead he relies on the added dialog between himself and the other people in his story. The dialog lacks details and is constantly back and forth. For example he writes, “‘Which one of you wants to go first?’ he asked. ‘Me’ I said. ‘What is your name?’ he asked. ‘Adam’ I said.” Adam’s feelings and thoughts are often missing in his story and are only present in his opening and closing paragraphs. It is almost as if his supporting paragraphs are simply a retelling of a day without the main character’s internal thoughts. There is purpose in his writing but it is not compelling.

Adam rarely attempts to use descriptive words in his writing; descriptors are only in the opening and closing paragraphs and the first sentence of his first supporting paragraph. It says, “After the augsausting (exhausting) ride, we finally got to the fair.” After this, adjectives and adverbs are missing from his writing, leaving the language dull. Adam sticks to basic and familiar words to communicate. Although the language is not exciting, the words do support the meaning.

Most of this piece does not invite expressive oral reading, as there is little cue for the reader to know the feeling behind the text. Dialog is strictly back and forth and feeling is lacking. Not all sentences begin the same way; therefore, there is variety in the structure and length of his sentences. Incomplete sentences leave the reader looking for clues in surrounding sentences to understand meaning. For example Adam writes, “Excited for one reason and one reason only.” Who is excited? Additionally he writes, “And will never forget it.” Forget what? Who will never forget? Although his sentences do not seem artfully put together, the piece as a whole does contain meaning.

Adam’s spelling is usually correct, and when it is not correct it is usually phonetically correct. For example he titles this story “The Pualup Fair” instead of “The Puyallup Fair”. This was a great attempt for a difficult word! Sentences usually begin with capital letters. There are some errors found in his ending punctuation; this is mostly seen with his use of dialog. For example he writes, “‘Hello boys!’. he said.” Here he adds an additional unnecessary period after the quote. Errors in grammar are not frequent, and when they are present they do not distort meaning. The use of paragraphing is present. Although, he combined his last main idea and the closing paragraph together, where he should have added another paragraph for his closing.

Ownership

Adam shared with me that he enjoys writing. When he is writing on his own he prefers to write and illustrate his own comics and fictional stories. In school, Adam prefers assignments that allow him to write about his own life. When asked about his writing abilities, Adam said,  “I am a pretty good writer but I don’t think I have good handwriting.” From his description of himself, and after reading his writing, it seems as if he would enjoy the freedom to write more creative pieces when he is not being judged or graded. When he has to write for an assignment he seems to prefer to write or simply retell a personal experience, not having to think outside the box for further creativity.

Spelling

According to the spelling inventory I gave Adam, and according to Bear et. al., Adam would fall in the middle intermediate to early advanced reading and writing stages. Given the words he spelled incorrectly, he needs more practice on syllables and affixes as well as derivational relations. For example, when attempting to spell “opposition”, he wrote “opposion”. This at tells me that he was unaware of the syllables present and the appropriate affix for this word stem. Similar patterns are seen in the other words he spelled incorrectly like “celler” and “confidend”.

Lesson Plan

Rationale

I have chosen a small group lesson that teaches the concept of voice in writing. A specific voice is missing in Adam’s writing, as seen in the assessment of voice in his writing above. With an improvement in voice, I believe Adam will also be motivated to improve his word choice and become more intentional about his sentence structure. Additionally, Adam enjoys writing fiction at home so I wanted to give him an opportunity to do so (with some structure) at school. Finally, the concept of voice is something that most sixth grade students need to develop, which would make this a great small group lesson. The lesson is a three part lesson because voice is hard to teach in one block period.

Objectives

1.     Students will be able to understand voice and how it is created in a piece of writing.

2.     Students will be able to create a piece of writing that incorporates strategies that demonstrate an understanding of voice in writing.

Standard(s)

EALR 3.2.1 Applies understanding that different audiences and purposes affect writer’s voice.

Writes in a characters voice (e.g., retells a story using the point of view and voice of a

character in the story; explains a historic event in the voice of a participant in that event).

Assessment

1.     Teacher will assess students’ understanding of voice and how it is created in a piece of writing by listening to group discussion and listening for accurate connections between voice and how it is demonstrated in a piece of writing.

2.     Teacher will assess student’s ability to create a piece of writing that incorporates strategies that demonstrate an understanding of voice in writing by looking at the student’s piece of writing and looking for carefully chosen and arranged words that clearly reflect the character’s age, personality and point of view. Teacher will also look for sentence length and structure that is varied in such a way that all sentences connect naturally to the character.

Materials

3-6 copies of Voices in the Park by Anthony Browne

7 copies of the Character Analysis Chart (Attached)

Writer’s Notebooks (For student brainstorming and first drafts)

Instructional Strategies

DAY 1

Begin the lesson by doing a shared reading (Routman, 2003, Ch.9) of Voices in the Park by Anthony Browne with the small group. After reading the book, begin a discussion about voice in writing by calling attention to the four voices in this story. Make sure to talk about why voice is important in writing, who the voice in a piece of writing usually represents (the writer), what voice does (gives one point of view), and how it is used (to show a particular set of attitudes that allow the reader to hear the words spoken in their head). Then, discuss the facts in the story – the things that stay the same from character to character. 

Assign one voice from the story to each student in the group and pair them up with another student with the same assigned voice. Hand out the Character Analysis Chart and think aloud to demonstrate how to use the chart with the first voice. Students will use the text and pictures to determine facts and personality traits about their assigned character. Encourage students to find multiple supports for each of their claims; emphasizing that textual support is needed. The teacher will check in with each pair to see if they are all able to be successful with the assignment or if they need additional guidance. This would be considered guided practice as described by Routman.

After each pair is done, the teacher will have students share out their ideas with the whole group.

The teacher will focus the discussion on each character’s personality and supporting assertions with evidence from both the text and the illustrations.

DAY 2

Recall the previous day’s lesson on voice with the small group students. Then, begin the discussion on how voice is written into a story or essay by looking at strategies that Browne used in Voices in the Park. Questions to raise: Does all writing have a voice? How does sentence length vary from character to character? Sentence structure? Word choice? Word order, etc.?

As a group, brainstorm situations in which there may be more than one point of view. For each situation, include a list of the various “voices” that may be involved. For example, an argument out on the playground could include the bully, the victim, the recess guard and the principal.

As a group, decide on one situation that the group will write a story for. Have students list the “facts” of the story—what will definitely happen regardless of whom is telling the story. Students will choose one of the possible voices and, in their writer’s notebooks, brainstorm how they will make their character’s voice clear. 

DAY 3

Students will spend time writing their part of the story. When completed, students will assist each other in revisions to improve the voice of the character in their writing. When writing is complete, students will read their pieces to the group to show the “complete” story of the chosen situation written from all points of view. Students will celebrate their writing, as suggested in Routman (Routman, 2005, Ch.2).

Reference:

Lesson adapted from National Council of Teachers of English. Teaching Voice with Anthony Browne’s Voices in the Park. Found at http://www.readwritethink.org/classroom-resources/lesson-plans/teaching-voice-with-anthony-167.html?tab=1#tabs.

Google docs

I am fascinated by the functionality offered in Google docs. Google docs can be used by anyone with access to the internet. With a google account you can create and share documents, spreadsheets, presentations, forms, drawings and even whole folders. A google account holder can also post previously created documents and save on Google docs to share with anyone they desire.

When I used this website I chose to post an excel spreadsheet that I created on my MacBook (both Mac and PC are compatible with Google docs). The spreadsheet I created combined all of the homework, readings and assignments I have due in all of my classes combined during this Winter quarter. I set the privacy settings to allow only people who I emailed the document link to access the document. These people were also able to make changes to the document if they desired. This project took me 4+ hours since it was very complicated to combine different layouts into one. I allowed my whole cohort to access my document and make changes. Since then, a few people have made changes to the document. Although, this does not go to say that using Google docs should be challenging to new technology users. The document in its most current form can be found here: My Google doc.

I really enjoyed the translation function available within an individual document. I see this being very useful for sending home letters to parents in multiple languages or even if trying to email a parent who speaks another language. I have been told that the translation function is fairly accurate. Additional helpful capabilities of this site are the chat function and the real-time changes. For example, if I have a document open and one of my peers has the same document open, we can chat about the document and make real-time changes to the document for each of us to see. This can be very helpful when collaborating with others on work. This would be great for students who are working on a project together and will allow them to work over the internet instead of meeting face to face, if that is a challenge.

What Mathematics Education should be

I have heard people say that math plays no role in the world besides its presence in the school classroom. While I very much disagree with this statement, as I am sure many people do, I think the main problem is not with the person but with their experience of mathematics education. Mathematics education, like all other education, is a part of a swinging pendulum where reform and new theories take teaching in one direction and then later in another. In the past, I believe the focus of elementary mathematics education was simply for students to learn the steps necessary to solve given problems and memorize a set of math facts. This type of education allowed little freedom in thinking and exploration. This type of education has misled many people to think that math is separate from the real world and has planted within them the idea that you will rarely use any math you learn in school.

Today, the pendulum has swung the opposite way. Now the idea is to enable students to mathematize their worlds, to find meaning and understanding from a mathematical approach. Teachers are encouraged to  allowing students to discover math, much like they discover science, and then share their ideas and their thinking with the rest of the class.  No longer is there a goal to open children's brains and plant the necessary information, instead there should be freedom in allowing students to make their own discoveries. Through this type of exploration, and according to Fosnot and Dolk, teachers must give students context in their exploration. In addition, the context of the assignments must be open enough to allow for individual development. It is all very exciting to read about "new" ideas for mathematics education. I am eager to learn more and incorporate these ideas in my own class.

Opening the unused cart of new Mac laptops

This week I got permission from my main placement to both teach the math lesson AND "crack" open the dusty yet brand new mac laptops for the students to use. Since I use a mac myself, I was very comfortable in getting them out and setting them up for each of the 25 students. I was not even the least bot fearful to lead a lesson where 25 second graders were playing on laptops for the first time! It was an awesome experience! I was even able to teach the students how to use the laptops AND the lesson specifically. The kids loved me right away because I provided them with a much more engaging spelling lesson than they are used to. Plus, the students were actually learning. One student said to me "I am addicted. I am going to do this at home now too." Awesome!

So here is what I did: I observed a intermediate teacher work on this website called SpellingCity with his students and I decided this would be great for my second graders. The website allows a teacher, for free, to enter in and save all of his/her weekly spelling words. Students go to the site, from school or at home, search the teacher's name and find the appropriate spelling list for that week. Then, students are presented with numerous interactive games where students can practice their spelling words. Some of the games include a word search, crossword with vocabulary, match it sentences, hang mouse, and audio word match. There were three additional aspects of this type of "practice" lesson that I really appreciated. First, the games game immediate feedback about whether or not the students were choosing the right word or spelling it correctly. Often times in classrooms there are many areas where elementary students do not get feedback about how they are doing so they do not know if they need to change something they are doing. I really enjoyed this aspect. Second, I felt as though this lesson was differentiated. Students were allowed to select their own games to play; some games were much challenging than others. Students who I knew needed a greater challenge ended up on the more difficult games and vice versa. Lastly, I felt that a interactive lesson like this, one with instant verbal and visual directions, questions and feedback was more accessible to the ELL students in the class. These students were enjoying the lesson as much as the rest of the class and were actually helping explain how to play some games to other students in the class.

I loved this lesson involving technology and I am excited to use these computers on a more regular basis!

Final thoughts on intermediate math

Prior to taking this first math methods class, I had neither idea nor experience in how to teach math. Everything presented in this class was new to me and I soaked it up like a sponge. In conjunction with this class, I took the opportunity to teach only math lessons in my Dyad placement this quarter in order to use what I was learning in class in my own lessons. I found this to be very beneficial in helping me to see how what we were learning worked for me as I taught, worked for my students and aided in my retention of this new knowledge.

There is a lot that I have learned during my time in this class. The foundation of my knowledge began with the constructivist view on teaching math; where we help students build connections in their math learning by meeting them where they are. This is view allows for lots of discussion, questioning and exploring, and is different than the drill and kill method. Then, I gained some helpful criteria for group worthy tasks; ensuring that everything we give to student to accomplish in groups is both worthy of their time and allows each student to contribute their strengths. Learning about math discussions and sequencing student presentations that scaffold important mathematical ideas in a way that is most beneficial to students was fascinating. My dyad partner and I even tried this in one of the lessons we taught together. It was challenging, yet engaging for the students and I know the students gained from this experience. I also learned about the value of integrating other subjects and resources, such as manipulatives, into math lessons. This integration invites all students to be successful in the lesson and can increase engagement. I could go on and on with all that I have learned, but there are two important pieces I will take away from this class. One, we should never to answer questions that students can figure out on their own. Instead, using excellent questioning strategies we can aid students in reaching understanding on their own. They may struggle, but in the end this will be more beneficial for them than for us as teachers to simply give them the answers. Second, each student has his or her own math identity and each student is good at math in some way. I was that student who always thought I was bad at math. I am looking forward to helping all students find their math identity and understand that they all have a brain for math.

Much of what I have learned I have already begin applying or plan to apply to my own teaching. In fact, practicing what I was learning this quarter while teaching myself was very helpful. When it comes to questions I may have following this class, I cannot think of any at this moment. Due to the fact that everything I learned this quarter was new, I am still taking it all in and I know I have so much more to learn. What there is for me to learn I am not sure of.

I think this class was beneficial and I thank you for the time you have taught us. One thing that would have been helpful for me this quarter would have been to have some sort of objective for the day’s lesson. While I was enjoying class, and learning much from my reflections on class and readings, during class I often found myself wondering what I was supposed to be learning specifically from what was being taught. I do not mean to be harsh by any means, I loved this class, and I know that you enjoy going with the flow of the class. Although, I would have liked to hear from you what it was that you wanted us to receive each day from the lessons you provided us (implications for teaching). I wanted to gain more from your knowledge and not just my peers. Again, I appreciate you and your wealth of knowledge. Thanks for this quarter!

Making writing regular, enjoyable and worth it

Through much of my readings in literacy this quarter I seem to continue to come across the same three ideas: regular, enjoyable and worth it. These are in my own words of course. I keep circling back to these ideas for a few different reasons. For one, these would not have been the three words I would come up with when asked about teaching writing. Secondly, I have not seen these modeled in my current placements so these ideas stood out to me as something very different than I am seeing. I love these ideas because I think they are critical to teaching students how to write and I think they tie together much of what we have been learning.

Regular & Enjoyable

In Routman’s book she discusses how writing needs to happen on a regular basis. In addition, writing needs be completed in varying contexts. This can be a writing response, a free write, writing for another subject and so on. Something in this past week’s reading that stuck with me was how Routman explained that students need plenty of time practicing reading without being tested, and the same goes for their writing. Students need to have plenty of practice writing without it being graded. This was a major aha moment for me. I was under the impression that every piece of writing needed to be checked or graded; in the past this frustrated me when teachers did not follow through on this. Now, I understand that students need to practice without the pressure that they are being graded. Granted, students still need to practice good writing skills and the writing process even though the piece may not be completely checked. As for enjoyable, if writing is more regular I believe students will come to love writing. Additionally, if students are given options during their regular writing, they may find an outlet of writing they love. Celebrated student writing is also more likely to help students enjoy writing!

Worth it

In my observations, and my time as an elementary student, student writing is rarely celebrated or published in some way. Writings are usually published at least twice a year. Students need to have a sense that their writing is important and that it is worth it. I believe with worthwhile assignments, many opportunities for publishing and still more opportunities for celebration of writing will help students to feel like writing is worth it. In the end, this too will improve student writing.

Here I am now

Looking back on my thoughts on the use of iPod Touches or other similar hand held technologies, my thinking has not changed too much. I think in the beginning I was more skeptical as to whether or not these were actually being used in the classrooms and now I have arrived at the understanding that they may not be in full use but they are being used. In addition, their use is spreading.

In my previous post on the iPod Touch, I was missing real life examples of how a class set of these are being used in classrooms today. I am struggling to find this information, although I am definitely on the look out. I plan to keep my eyes and ears open in the months to come for more practical uses. The reason why I am still searching is because I do not think the way in which we have used the iPod Touch this past quarter is realistic for an individual teacher to do on their own. Each interaction we have had with students and the Touch is one on one. Granted there have been some helpful applications, such as being able to record students as they read. On the other hand, I am still searching. I have been checking out professional blogs and YouTube videos for answers.

Lastly, I am interested in the funding of a class set of iPod Touches. I am sure there is some grant out there that would help pay for something like this for classroom use. I would love to be the teacher who has them in her classroom. Maybe then I can experiment with more uses. Therefore, I am on the hunt to find funding for a project like this because even though I am searching for uses, I do believe the ipod Touch can have a positive impact on student learning.